I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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