Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
