So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
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