"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Randomize
