I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
