I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
