addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Houston, we have a blender
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
