Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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