I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
