I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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