it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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