I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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