So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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