Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
