if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
