May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Randomize
