i was born a porn star she said
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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