omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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