8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
You left your phone here
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