Ambien. No doubt about it.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
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