you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
Randomize
