talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize