pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Randomize