so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
