Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
