i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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