i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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