Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
