Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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