he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Randomize
