Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Randomize
