yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
