My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
