Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
50% drunk capacity currently
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Randomize