And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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