john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
