the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Randomize
