I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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