my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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