gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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