Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
im holly from the hills drunk
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
