addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Randomize
