Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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