I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
