And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize