Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
