she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Man, jail baloney is awful.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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