He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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