Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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