my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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