I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize